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Straight White Boy Problem #385


*in class* why do we need to know this
*in drivers ed* why do we need to know this
*reading prices at stores* why do we need to need to know this
*kim kardashian article on yahoo home page* why do we need to know this
*looking at electoral ballot* why do we need to know this
*reads protein powder nutritional information* its imperative to know how many scoops of powder I must obtain for maximum output of body mass in as little time as possible


Trying to explain the appeal of Waffle House to someone who has never been to Waffle House is quite the task.

"I mean, y’know, it’s kind of disgusting, really, but it’s the best truckstop food you’ll ever have, and its deliciousness varies depending on when you go. Is it nearing midnight and your family has foregone Christmas dinner entirely because Grandma’s no longer around and you and your mom are both fucking starving? Go to Waffle House. Is it 3am and you’re trying to sober up with the aid of coffee and a few extra large discs of overly sweetened leavened batter? Go to Waffle House. Is it 5pm and you actually just really like their food but don’t want to risk being seen by anyone you know? Go!"

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